As a human being, my needs of study is just like a roller coaster. It is very fluctuation. yaps! sometimes I reach the high needs of study and in other hand I really lose of motivation to study. There is so many story of mine about study, let me tell you one of them.
It is about my own willingness of study when I already knew about the mathematics history. At that time, I hate the course of mathematics discipline studies. It is like I was pushed to pay full attention towards the signs and symbols and also the step in doing the problem. I do not like that because that is not my own way to study and love mathematics, that is the lecturer way not mine.The big question is "What's for?". I can solve the mathematics problems even I do not use appropriate symbol and steps. Fiiuuh, much think about it much hate of it. Then I choose to refresh my "mathematics brain" by read a story about mathematics. I just thought that is the best way of run away from mathematics even it was still about mathematics. the important things is I do not met with those signs and symbols again. But do you know what happened next? The book I read is 'Mathematicians are people too', the book tell me about the struggle in spread the mathematics study to the people surrounding them. In my mind the mathematicians appear and said to me about how hard to them to just made others know about mathematics whereas the people did not forced to find the mathematics study by their self. They tried to find the best way to make the others easily understand and remember about mathematics, they made any notes of the way in solving problem and each symbol of its.They made me know what mathematics for and why I have to study mathematics now. Oh my God! I shamed to the mathematicians. For me, the generations who life in 21st century era who just used the mathematics study that has been found, I underestimate the existing symbol and steps even it has been studied and proven over years. I just do not want to study because that is not my way of study mathematics but the fact said that all of the steps and symbols is already prepared for me to easily understand mathematics. The benefit of having skills in operate the symbols and steps is fully for my own life. Oh my! I want to gives the best appreciation to them and to mathematics study. From that time, I give my full attention in using the symbols, signs, and steps. I really carefully using them because I do not want to teach the wrongness to others.
From now on too, I realized that what I have done of being motivated by the story is because I already know that the study is related to me and it is for me. In MMSEL courses, it is called motivation of autonomy. At the first time I hate mathematics symbols because someone pushed me to study it and in other hand I still confused "is it works? is it the best way? I do not think it is for me, it is just for show off the lecturer capability in using that symbols". But when I find another perspective from that book, I sure that every signs, symbols, and steps is useful for me and makes me become better learner and teacher. The point is the feeling of "ownership" and "me". Because I own the study and it is for me.
I am thinking about the function of 'apperception' time at the lesson plan "pendidikan berkarakter" which I first learn from SMAN 61 Jakarta. It is the basic motivation to make the students have the ownership of the lesson I would to teach. oh beautiful! :)
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